The Kansas City Arrowheads recorded their fifth shutout of the season in a 3-0 win at Pittsburgh that looked close on the scoreboard, but never really felt close on the field.

Pittsburgh began the day recovering an Arrowhead fumble at the KC 35. Little did Steeler fans know it would turn out to be the team's best field position of the entire game. Pittsburgh was whistled for a hold on its first offensive possession and never penetrated inside the Arrowhead 40 for the remainder of the night.

Meanwhile, Kansas City was moving the ball at will in the early going. The Arrowheads' first four possessions resulted in 166 yards of offense, but only 3 points thanks not only to the early fumble, but also by a red zone interception of a Dale Cox throw to stifle a drive on the team's second possession. Roderick Burns' 22-yard field goal barely avoided being yanked wide to the left and resulted in the only points of the night.

From there, the offense stumbled home while the defense stood tall against every challenge.

William Marriott, getting the start due to injury to Mark Prendergast, responded with 100 yards on 24 carries. Dan "The Minister" Parson finished with 10 tackles to spearhead the defensive effort.

Kansas City improves to 12-2 on the season and can clinch the AC west with a win or tie when the team hosts Washington for its regular-season home finale. The 'Skins (9-5) have secured the NC East title already.

Washington did something few teams have done all season by slicing apart the Arrowheads' defense in a 19-13 victory. Despite the loss, Kansas CIty backs into the playoffs as the divisional champion thanks to an Oakland loss. KC also retains its inside position on homefield advantage throughout the playoffs.

Everything started swell for Kansas City. Ryan Paxton returned the game's first punt 30 yards to the 'Skins' 36. From there, the team worked it methodically down to set up a 3-yard Dave Cox-to-Scott Willis touchdown pass for a 7-0 lead.

But Kansas City had no answer for Washington's Andrew Merle. The Skins kicker booted field goals of 50, 57 and 44 yards, the last of which came as time expired in the first half to send Washington to a 9-7 halftime lead. He added another 50-yarder to open the second half scoring and extend Washington's lead to five points.

Albert Green gave Kansas City a prime opportunity late in the third quarter as he picked off a pass deep in Washington territory. The Arrowheads were only able to get three points after Green set them up at the 11, however.

The Skins blew the game open moments later, first connecting for a 78-yard TD pass before intercepting Cox after the Arrowheads had moved into position to at least attempt a field goal to trim the 9-point gap back to a one-score margin. Instead, Kansas City had to wait until there were fewer than six minutes remaining before Roderick Burns could boot a 40-yard field goal to trim the gap to 19-13. The Arrowheads had one more crack after holding Washington and getting the ball back at their own 26. The drive progressed across midfield, but a failed 4th-and-8 gave the ball back to Washington as KC watched helplessly as the game was kneeled out.

William Marriott had 129 combined rushing and receiving yards for Kansas City. Cox was 26-for-34 through the air but accounted for just 187 yards of offense.

Kansas City, 12-3 on the season, closes out the regular season against divisional foe Los Angeles (9-6). A win by KC clinches home field throughout the playoffs for the Arrowheads, who surprisingly only had 89 percent attendance for today's game.

Kenny Phoenix crushed a 59-yard field goal as time expired to lift Los Angeles to a 16-15 victory over the Kansas City Arrowheads and crush KC's dreams of holding home field advantage for the playoffs. The Arrowheads will still have a first-round bye, and will need to use that time to contemplate the back-to-back losses that the team carries into the postseason.

Turnovers were the issue last night. Kansas City surrendered the football three times with two of the miscues resulting in points for LA. The third came inside the red zone as the Arrowheads appeared to be driving for a score.

The last-second kick by LA and turnovers also tarnished an otherwise solid offensive game for the Arrowheads. Kansas City finished with 393 yards of offense. Dave Cox was 32-for-38 slinging the rock for 292 yards, including a 9-yard touchdown pass to Benjamin Gore with 74 seconds remaining. At the time, it appeared the score would deliver the game to Kansas City, but a blown extra point proved to be lethal and cast a black cloud over a game where Roderick Burns was 3-for-3 on field goals as the Arrowheads scored on three successive possessions in the first half.

William Marriott had 112 combined rushing and receiving yards. Darryl Bracco added 91 yards receiving on six receptions.

Kansas City will spend its off week looking to heal. The Arrowheads played without starting RB Mark Prendergast and starting center Jason Barnard in the contest. The coaching staff says both men would be listed as questionable if the Arrowheads played this week, but expressed optimism that with the extra week both might be available for the postseason.

Kansas City (12-4) will host Jacksonville should they defeat Tennessee. Otherwise the winner of the Oakland-Cleveland contest will journey to town.

It'll be Cleveland as the Browns journey to town to do battle with your Kansas City Arrowheads. Cleveland dispatched Oakland by a 17-12 final count.

This will be the second meeting between the two teams as Kansas City defeated the Browns by a 21-3 final score back in Week 4, but that win came at a time when the Browns hardly resembled a playoff team. Cleveland lost 5 of its first 7 contests this season before finishing with a flurry. Kansas City, on the other hand, will enter the fray on back-to-back losses.

The week off was precisely what the Arrowheads needed, however. Nobody on the roster is listed at worse than probable on the injury report, meaning Kansas City should be at full strength come opening kickoff.

The winner will either host Tennessee or travel to Miami for the Conference Championship contest.

CLEVELAND (11-6) at KANSAS CITY (12-4)

TALE OF THE TAPE
Offense
Passing YPG -- KC 6th-182.9, CLE 8th-178.2
Rushing YPG -- KC 9th-97.2, CLE 12th-90.8
Total YPG -- KC 3rd-280.1, CLE 5th-269.0
Scoring -- KC 6th-13.5 ppg, CLE 8th-12.8 ppg

Defense
Passing YPG -- KC 3rd-122.7, CLE 6th-126.5
Rushing YPG -- KC 13th-71.8, CLE 17th-79.5
Total YPG -- KC 3rd-192.5, CLE 5th-200.7
Scoring -- KC 2nd, 6.4 ppg, CLE 6th-8.4 ppg

Intangibles
Turnover margin -- KC t-20th, -3, CLE 13th, +4
Net Punting -- KC 22nd, 42.3, CLE 14th, 43.7
FG accuracy -- KC 78.8%, CLE 90.6%

Vegas Line: KC -3 (not that anyone bets on these things...)

Dreams of a spot in the league championship game evaporated in a 9-3 kicking shootout against Miami last night. The loss comes on the heels of a 13-10 win by way of a last-second field goal in the Conference semifinals the previous week.

The question now remains...was this season sufficient to save the coaching staff's jobs?

At the midway point of the season, the Kansas City Arrowheads sit on a woeful 1-7 record. After a 13-5 mark saved his bacon a season ago and earned him a one-year contract extension, the pitchfork and torch party is once again amassing on the edge of town for head coach John Torres and this time there may not be a way out. Offensive coordinator Billy Ugarte looks equally screwed in the job-security department from where we're sitting.

The Arrowhead offense has been non-existent this season with the team managing just a single touchdown through the opening eight games of the season. And it is hard to fathom exactly why. Kansas City is completing a respectable 66.5 percent of its passes (12th in the league), but is managing a meager 140.3 passing yards per game (20th) and 4.3 yards per passing attempt (29th). Meanwhile, the rushing game is gaining 92.9 yards per game (11th) despite a first-half injury that kept starter Mark Prendergast out of action for a not-insignificant span of time.

Kansas City even hit the trade telephone thinking adding a little speed might tip the balance in its favor after five games, considering that three of KC's four losses in that span were by less than a touchdown. The Arrowheads' offense HAS improved by just over 12 yards per game since making those moves, but it was hardly the splash the team was thinking of when making its trades.

Turnovers have been a huge factor with the Arrowheads as they sit minus-11 in the takeaway/giveaway department.

Defensively, you can't really complain about what the team has done. In fact, if you stared at that side of the ledger it would be hard to believe the team holds just one win on the season. The Arrowheads have limited opponents to 205 yards of offense per game, fifth-best in the league. The team also ranks in the top 10 of rushing yardage allowed, passing yardage allowed and completion percentage against.

We just need to score some [redacted Samuel L. Jackson-ism} points to capitalize on what that defense is doing. We've been shut out 3 times in 8 games and average fewer than 5 points per contest...surprisingly NOT the worst in the league...or even the second-worst...but close enough.

While nobody is exactly tearing it up in the AC West this season, the Arrowheads are three games back and chasing everybody in the division. The way things are going, it seems hard to imagine a turnaround taking place, even with a second-half schedule that currently only features two teams over the .500 mark.

So, we here at KCK, will close by saying to please leave some tar and feathers for us so that we may make plans to join the coach-sacking party following week 16.

As we arrive at the three-quarter point of the season, I was going to open this posting with something comparing Kansas City's season with Dante's conceptualization of ****. The problem is I can't figure out if we're in the fifth circle (Anger) or the eighth circle (Fraud).

Whichever one it is, the Arrowheads hold a league-worst 1-11 record. The team is mired in a 10-game losing streak. Kansas City sits at a dismal -20 in the takeaway/giveaway ledger this season.

MINUS. TWENTY.

To put that into perspective, there are only two other teams in the league that have worse than a -10 count. With four games to go, the Arrowheads are on pace for the League Hall of Shame by eclipsing 2019 Seattle's horrid -23 final tally.

But Seattle managed to win four games that season. It would take the most illegal of hallucinogens to even start envisioning Kansas City winning three of its final four to get to that mark. Not with an offense that is averaging just under 4.7 points per game. Surprisingly, that ISN'T the worst in the league. ****, it isn't even the worse in our division -- thank you Denver, but we're coming to get you.

The Purge is coming. Every coach on the offensive side of the ball might as well start cleaning out their office now, because when the firings happen -- and they WILL happen -- the offensive wing of stadium offices will be reduced to smoldering rubble more thoroughly than King's Landing. Much burnination is coming.

The real tragedy here is that all of this **** is hiding the performance of the No. 2 defense in the league. The Arrowheads are surrendering just 200.3 yards per game -- IN SPITE OF 20 giveaways!! With even a marginally competent offense, that effort should translate to a .500 season. That we're not even close is just a testimony of the severity of this train wreck.

This season is a dumpster fire at ground zero of the Trinity test site with a mushroom cloud rising quickly. Sure, 2018 Cincinnati was worse, but 2018 Cincinnati was TRYING to be worse. That was a jackassical tank job. This isn't.

THIS is a collection of incompetents drawing paychecks by masquerading as an offense under the tutelage of a coaching staff that goes home at night in a clown car. There isn't another team in league history that deserves consideration as being worse. THAT is the depth to which the Arrowheads have buried themselves.

And it can't be over with soon enough.

No fans, you're not dreaming -- the Arrowheads snapped a 10-game skid by posting a 12-3 victory over New Orleans.

This will do absolutely nothing to save the coaching staff's soul following Week 16. It just demonstrates that after screwing up the follow-up to a 13-win season, they might also somehow manage to screw up securing the No. 1 draft spot as well.

But at least the team seemed to react a tiny bit to what we wrote in the last issue. Maybe they do care.

Roderick Burns' field goal as time expired lifted the Arrowheads to a 9-6 victory over Indy and a second consecutive victory. Kansas City is now mathematically eliminated from receiving the draft's top pick and will have to settle for a selection somewhere in the 2-4 range depending on how things go in the season's final week.

Oh, and that stuff we said about strong illegal hallucinogens being needed to see Kansas City reach four wins a few weeks back? Yeah, that wasn't a confession for any of our readers who might happen to work in law enforcement. Or stadium security around Section 138, Row 6. Even if we did forget a whole game and it was really an 11-game losing streak and not a 10-gamer like we reported in the last post. When your life as a fan has been one long downpour this season, can you really be blamed if you lose count of the number of raindrops?

It is nice to see some late-season life in this squad though. While the points still aren't coming in the form of touchdowns, the defense is finally getting some support in the form from of scores from the offense.

One more game and then the off-season!

Where in the **** has this team been all season?

Kansas City nearly doubled its number of touchdowns recorded this season by closing the season with a 20-6 win over Carolina. That's three consecutive victories to bring the team's record to 4-12 this season.

As expected, a press release announcing the firing of head coach Jon Torres and much of the rest of the offensive coaching staff was distributed to the media before the Arrowheads made it back to the locker room.

"We are happy to finish the season on a positive note," said General Manager RedNU. "But when you look at the overall body of work, it was just too little, too late. We need to look for a more innovative set of offensive minds to complement the amazing defense we played for our fans. Kansas City deserves a consistent winner, and they haven't had that."

Torres, who has been with the Arrowheads since their inaugural season, departs with a 27-39 overall record.